After testing a vast array of energy products on The Road to Nowhere, it only seemed logical to compile the results and see which product reigned supreme. If you wanted to ride like a rock star, and weren’t into steroids or illegal substances, what would you go with?
This is how the products compared…..
Top Speed (mph)
Clif Shot 30.2
5 Hour 28.4
Maximum Heart Rate (bpm)
Clif Shot 177
5 Hour 174
15 Mile Time (min:sec)
Clif Shot 46:34
5 Hour 46:50
Coffee, Ephedrine, and MiniThin took the podium in all three categories. Ephedrine, if this were a stage race, would be the winner. However, a steady diet of Ephedrine would certainly have some serious ramifications. It could lead to a crack habit. Your friends may quit hanging around you. You may find DEA agents parked in front of your house. If you sign that book at 7-11 too often, you will undoubtedly wind up on some kind of watch list. Is keeping a defibrillator on hand “just in case” really worth it?
That being said, I would have to give coffee the nod as my pre-ride boost of choice. It is simple. It is legal. It is relatively cheap. It is socially acceptable. It can be flavored with a variety of tasty creamers such as hazelnut, vanilla, and mocha. Unlike the fish oil taste of Ephedrine, coffee actually has a good flavor!
I can only hope that these tests have shed some light on questions my fellow cyclists may have had. At this time, I would like to extend an offer to test any products (given they are legal) that you may spark your curiosity. Just let me know. If it is feasible, I will test them.
Yours in Science,